By Sheryl Gerrard, MA, GC-G, CDP, JFS Senior Engagement Manager
As Rosalynn Carter famously stated, there are only four kinds of people in the world: those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers. Her point was that caregiving is a nearly universal experience. That’s why every November we celebrate National Family Caregivers Month. While caregivers should be celebrated every day, this is a time to recognize and honor caregivers nationally, raise awareness around caregiving issues, educate communities, and work to increase support for our nation’s caregivers.
In the United States today, it is estimated that 53 million adults are providing care for a spouse, elderly parent or relative, or a child with disabilities. Many of us provide support or assistance to family members or friends without identifying ourselves as caregivers. We may feel we are just fulfilling the obligations of our role as spouses, adult children, parents, or considerate neighbors. Recognizing that one is a caregiver can be a first step towards reducing the stressors often associated with this life situation. You may be a family caregiver if you are the person who buys groceries, cooks, cleans the house, or does laundry for someone who needs some help with these things. A caregiver is also the person who helps a friend or family member get dressed, take a shower, or take their medication properly. Or even the person who makes medical appointments, communicates with a loved one’s doctors, or drives them to appointments and to run errands. All of these situations describe “caregiving,” and if you are doing any or all of these things, you may be feeling drained, exhausted, or burned out.
Often, the caregiving journey is more of a marathon than a sprint and it’s important that you equip yourself for the long haul. Whether you are just starting out on your caregiving journey or you’ve been at it for a while, there are some tools that can be useful along the way.
– Stay on top of your own health and well-being: often, caregivers put their own needs aside while focusing on their loved ones and this can contribute to both physical and emotional issues. Make time to schedule your own medical appointments, exercise, and participate in selfcare activities so you can feel your best during difficult times.
– Let others assist: if someone offers to help, let them, and they will be encouraged to offer again in the future. Remember that a marathon runner gets support and encouragement from others, not to mention drinks and snacks along the way! When you feel like you’re on your own, reach out to a friend or family member to help you with some tasks so you can refuel.
– Join a group: there are many options for both in-person and virtual support and educational groups. By participating in a support group, you can decrease your feelings of isolation and learn from others in similar situations. Jewish Family Services offers several programs for family caregivers, such as a Parkinson’s Family Caregiver group and our quarterly Caregiver Speaker Series, as well as Caregiver Thrive Learn Connect (TLC), a 6-session psychoeducational group to teach practical coping skills and stress reduction techniques. Check our website for more information.
– Keep humor in your life: laughter really is the best med-icine. Watch a silly movie or read the comics and find things to laugh about with the loved one in your care as well; everyone needs playfulness in their day.
– Seek professional guidance when needed: whether you’re looking for supportive counseling for yourself or resources to help you care for your loved one, reach out to Jewish Family Services to receive knowledgeable direction to make your journey more manageable. Our Counseling Services can help you deal with life’s challenges and our Senior Engagement team has a wealth of information to support you as a caregiver.
– Find the joy in caregiving: having the opportunity to provide care for someone who cared for you can be rewarding and gratifying. Looking at your situation with a positive perspective can provide a sense of fulfillment and build self-confidence as you develop the skills needed to be a successful caregiver.
Jewish Family Services recognizes and understands the stresses family caregivers experience, and offers several different supportive services. Caregiver Thrive Learn Connect (TLC) is one of these programs. JFS is one of only a small handful of professionals with master-level training in this science-backed therapeutic training. This program is a six-week series that provides practical tools, online resources, and participant materials. Participants develop individual action plans each week and build skills and tools to manage stress, depression, frustration, self-care, and isolation. Results of this program show caregivers report a significant reduction in depressive symptoms and increases in self-confidence in relation to caregiving. Other caregiver support services include support groups and connections to resources.
If you or someone you know is feeling stressed or overwhelmed by managing a loved one’s care and has questions or would benefit from support, please contact us at (704) 364-6594 or jfscharlotte.org.
