By: Julie Loftis, JFS Marketing Specialist
This October, the purple ribbons and messages of solidarity you may see around Charlotte are more than symbolic gestures. They mark Domestic Violence Awareness Month, a national observance that reminds us of the prevalence of abuse, the silence that often surrounds it, and the urgent need for community response. This year, Jewish Family Services’ (JFS) campaign theme, #Every1KnowsSome1, is a reminder that domestic violence is not an issue happening “somewhere else” to “other people.” It is here, it is widespread, and it affects people we know.
Domestic violence touches lives across every race, religion, age, gender, and socioeconomic group. National statistics show that one in three women and one in four men experience some form of abuse in their lifetimes. According to Jewish Women International (JWI), in Jewish communities, the rates are similar: studies estimate that 15 to 25 percent of Jewish women and three to five percent of Jewish men experience battering or abuse from an intimate partner. Despite these sobering numbers, the subject has historically been under-acknowledged in Jewish communal life.
Experts point out that cultural factors can make abuse especially difficult to confront. Jewish women tend to remain in abusive relationships significantly longer than the national average—seven to thirteen years compared to three to five years for non-Jewish women. According to Jewish Community Relations Council (JCRC), the emphasis on “Shalom Bayit”, or peace in the home, can contribute to a stigma around speaking out. Survivors often feel pressure to maintain appearances or worry about bringing shame to their families or communities. In some cases, religious and cultural dynamics can even become tools of control; the withholding of a religious divorce, has been cited as one example of abuse uniquely affecting Jewish women.
“Domestic violence doesn’t have one look,” says one JFS clinician. “It is not confined to any one neighborhood, denomination, or income level. Survivors are our friends, our coworkers, our neighbors—and often we don’t even know their story.” That reality is what drives the #Every1KnowsSome1 campaign. The theme underscores that while many survivors remain hidden due to stigma, silence, or fear, their presence is all around us. Recognizing this is a first step toward meaningful change.
The campaign also seeks to dismantle myths. One common misconception is that abuse does not occur in Jewish communities; in truth, it crosses every demographic line. Another is that friends or family members would surely recognize if someone close to them were being abused. The reality is that survivors frequently suffer quietly, concealing their experiences to avoid judgment or protect themselves. As the campaign stresses, you may not know someone’s story, but you almost certainly know someone who has been affected.
Research also highlights how survivors in Jewish communities are more likely to turn to rabbis, educators, or other faith-based leaders for help rather than secular institutions. This underscores the need not only for increased awareness but also for stronger communal capacity to support survivors in ways that are compassionate, informed, and safe.
Domestic Violence Awareness Month is a call to action. Awareness can break silence, and silence-breaking can create the space for healing and safety. While statistics help reveal the scope of the problem, the campaign’s message returns to something more personal. If one in three women and one in four men will experience abuse, then indeed, every one of us knows someone. The challenge is to recognize that truth and respond with empathy, support, and a willingness to stand against abuse in all its forms.
Throughout the month of October, JFS will have information in the front lobby of the LJCC to spread awareness and education. Confidential help is available for anyone experiencing domestic violence. Jewish Family Services offers counseling and resources locally, and the National Domestic Violence Hotline can be reached at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). For survivors, the path forward is often difficult, but the message of this October’s campaign is clear: no one is alone, and together, communities can work to end the silence that has shielded abuse for far too long. Jfscharlotte.org